Question
My ex-husband has financially supported me and his children for many years. Now that I am on the verge of old age and sickly, he informed me that he will no longer be supporting me because it is not the obligation of a man to support his ex-wife. He says that I should look for work and support myself. In all the past years I have remained at home. Now he insists that I go out and search for work. He will continue paying for the secular education of his sons who are adults according to the Shariah because he wants them to have degrees and get good jobs. He says that he is not responsible for maintaining his baaligh children. All four children are baaligh. I had embraced Islam and have no Muslim relatives to whom I may refer for assistance. What is the Shariah's ruling for me?
Answer
It is unjust and not permissible for the children's father to suggest that you leave the home precincts, work and support yourself. As long as the children (the sons) are unable to support themselves, it remains the duty of their father to support them even if they have reached Buloogh (puberty). Only when they are capable of earning and fending for themselves, will supporting them not be obligatory on their father. However, as far as the girls are concerned he has to continue supporting them until they are married.
Although it is not incumbent on a man to support his ex-wife, in your case it remains compulsory for the menfolk of your husband's family, to support you since you have no Muslim male mahrams on whom to rely. It is not permissible for them to compel you to leave the home to earn. They have to support you.
In fact, if one's neighbour is destitute and unable to earn, then despite not being a family member, it is incumbent to support him and his family.
If your ex-husband and his family refuse to support you, then it will be compulsory for your sons to work and support you. It will not be permissible for you to work to earn. Your sons will have to abandon their studies and support you if their father refuses.
The claim that after they are married you will be on your own is utterly baseless in terms of the Shariah. It will remain the duty of your sons to support you as long as you are alive or as long as you have not married again. The duty of supporting a woman devolves on the closest male members of the family, and in a case where there are no Muslim male relatives, then the obligation will be on the males of the in-laws. If there are no relatives to support, then the obligation settles on the Muslim neighbours, then on the community as a whole.
However, the problem with the Muslim Ummah today is that in addition to being totally disorganized, they have enormous amounts of wealth for squandering on unnecessary luxuries, touring, bogus 'umrah' trips, haraam wedding functions and many other haraam activities. Sister, remain at home. Make dua, and remove your sons from secular studies to enable them to earn and support you, if your in-laws refuse to fulfil their duty towards you.
- Source
- themajlis.co.za
- Published in
- The Majlis Vol 24 No 07
- PDF page
- 11
Appears under ZAKAAT ON MINERALS (approximate).