Who should a man obey, his mother or his wife, and how should he keep this balanced?

Answer

It is Waajib for everyone, males and females, to obey their parents in all things which are permissible. It is not permissible to obey them if their instructions pertain to haraam. It is not an issue of obeying parents or the wife. It is an issue of obeying the Shariah. The man must submit to the Shariah, not to his parents nor to his wife nor to anyone.