What is the Islamic way for a boy and a girl to see each other with the intention of marriage?

Answer

It is not Waajib to see each other before marriage, but it is wise and advisable. The purpose of seeing is not to ascertain character. It is not possible to ascertain the character of the parties merely by a brief viewing and by exchanging a few words. The purpose of seeing is to ascertain if they have a natural attraction for each other. If there is no mutual natural/ emotional attraction, then they should not get married because in these times of corruption and the almost total lack of Taqwa, the parties, especially the man will be attracted by other women/men after their marriage. Since his wife exercises no natural/emotional attraction for him, he will perpetrate infidelity. We are aware of innumerable such cases. Even men who are outwardly pious and learned are guilty of such evil, treacherous conduct. Therefore, especially, in these times it is necessary to view each other before marriage, but the viewing must be arranged discreetly.

The viewing should be coincidental. The girl should not be aware that she is being viewed for the purpose of marriage. Frequently it happens that the boy after seeing the girl, is not inclined to her. Females being naaqisul aql are extremely hurt and grieved by what they perceive as a rejection. On the other hand, if the girl rejects the proposal of the boy, it will not or should not perturb the boy. He has to take the refusal in good spirit.